Should I send my best friend who has severe depression a Christmas gift?

Question

I haven't talked to her in about a month. She has severe lows where she just won't talk to anyone so I deal with it. I want to help her out and make her feel better by sending a Christmas gift, a necklace with a cross. I have this sappy card I want to give to her also. The problem is that I don't know her exact address. They don't get mail to their house so I can't put it in the mail box either.
Would it be appropriate to call her mom and ask for an address or a time I could drop it off? Will the gift and card even make my friend feel better?

Answer 1

Having dealt with depression many times myself, I can tell you that this sounds like an awesome idea. When people are depressed, they tend to drop out of all areas of life, including friendships. In my experience, this is because they feel so low, they don't want to feel like they're burdening other people with their problems. But this is just the time they want to feel like they've got people who care about them. Even if she acts like she wants nothing to do with you, I suspect that she really just wants to know that you really care about her. Giving her a gift at a time she's feeling all alone and like no one cares is the best thing you can do. I think it's great that you continue to try to have a friendship with her even when she acts like she doesn't want one. I'm sure she's feeling really alone and like no one really cares, because they leave her alone so easily, when she wants them to try harder to keep her in their lives. I hope this makes sense to you. It sounds like you're a true friend.

Answer 2

I guess we should give a gifts because we want to, not because we want, expect or need thanks. She should express thanks, of course. Rude not to. You seem to have a good relationship with your neice. After a few weeks, if she does not thank you, ask her how she liked the _______ you gave her. That should open up at least a discussion. You will then know if she liked the gift. Sometimes we are not taught proper etiquette by our parents, and really feel shy about thanking people. If you have always given her gifts, she may be hurt if you don't. Or At some other time, bring up the subject in the third party. Tell her a short story about a friend you sent a gift to and nebver heard from and you were wondering if she liked it. Or Speak straight out, tell your neice you love her lots, but would like her to acknowledge your gifts in some way, a call, a note, a comment. Or just keep doing what you have been, and assume she appreciates you and the gifts you give her.

Answer 3

Yes, go for it! I read an article recently which said receiving cards can help depression to be cured faster. I know a boy who tried to commit suicide, he's in an adolescent psychiatric unit. All his friends sent him cards on his birthday and he was delighted, it helped him so much just to know people are thinking of him and hadn't forgotten him.

Answer 4

I would definitely call her mom and ask for the address. This may help make her day some what brighter.... Good luck!

Answer 5

Absolutely do it. It may not cure her depression, but you'd be surprised how far a simple favor like that can go.

Answer 6

Yes it would probably make her feel nice.

Answer 7

yeah thats cute make it little tho

Answer 8

sure go for it. it shows that she is not alone that she has aleast one friend