You need a mentor. You need someone who achieved/acquired everything you want and who is willing to teach you how he got it. That way, you'll know you're on track. You may have to work to get his attention, but you can find them. Start by reading books like "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" it will tell you about a bunch of things, one of them being the need for a mentor and what it may take to get one.
However, I would probably first recommend getting into a lot of books:
Robert Kyosaki ("Rich Dad Poor Dad", and "Cashflow Quadrant" are excellent starts)
Dale Carnegie "How to Win Friends and Influence People"
Napoleon Hill "Think and Grow Rich" and "Master Key to Riches"
Shad Helmstedder "What to Say When You Talk to Yourself"
Gary Chapman "The Five Love Languages"
Florence Littauer "Personality Plus"
Dexter Yager "Dynamic People Skills"
Les Giblin "The Art of Dealing with People" and "How to Have Power and Confidence when Dealing with People"
Tom Venuto "Burn the Fat, Feed the Muscle" (ebook)
"The Adonis Effect" (ebook)
I would honestly find a Krav Maga course, or some kind of practical self defense class (try to stay away from MMA or Martial Arts if possible, but they're better than nothing).
Honestly, I've seen HUGE transformations from people getting into religion, specifically The Bible. I know it's worked for me, and finding a spiritual mentor has really changed my life in every area. I highly recommend you look into it if you haven't (and believe me finding a church to support me was very difficult and a long process, but I feel it was worth it).
Michael Webb has a wonderful course on how to bring Romance back into your marriage, you could check that out.
There's a lot of good information in those guys from the "Seduction" and "Pick Up Artist" lifestyle. You just have to make sure that you're reading it to figure out how to re-spark and maintain the attraction your wife feels for you and not to say "this isn't working, I'm just gonna go try to pick up some ho from the club". I recommend David DeAngelo and Dr. Paul.
That should be enough to get you going in the right direction. This is gonna be a HUGE commitment on your part. You're going to be tying up EVERYTHING you have into it, but the rewards will be worth it. The only other thing you REALLY need to do more than anything is change you association. You have got to start hanging around people who are the types of people you want to become. You need to stop hanging around people that aren't making you a better person. That will mean new friends and less time with family, but it's really the only way to figure out how to apply this stuff you'll be reading and learning. It's also how you fill find a mentor.
Good luck man! It is possible, I know I found what I was looking for. I have a mentor and a great group to associate with, I've read all the books I've recommended to you and I can tell you that it's helped me out in every area of my life. Feel free to contact me if you want some more info, maybe I can even get you in touch with a couple of my mentors if you're serious about it.