How can i curb my craving for luxury items i cant afford as am a council tenant,in debt,on benefits?

Question

I'm struggling with a mental illness which also includes deep depressions.I'm extremely poor & living in poverty due to my uncontrolable spending addiction.I WANT & CRAVE things all the time & as i havent got the money to get them as i'm disabled cant work,a council tenant in manchester,in deep deep debt & going through a form of bankcruptcy called a DRO & I only have just over £100 a week to live on to pay weekly instalments on my household bills and buy food but half the time i spend all this in one go and we dont have hardly anything in food to eat and cant even buy clothing and shoes.
I simply cant stop wanting for things i'm in no position to afford & i resent bitterly not having the money to get the things i want & i often have violent temper tantrums and mood swings as i cant get my mitts on the things i crave and covet after.
I feel that fed up i just stop in bed a lot-i cant afford to leave our home & go any where as my benefit money all goes all at once each fortnight so i have to stop at home until the next payday all because i've blown my money.
If i cant get the things i want then i'm in a foul mood all the time-i only temporarly feel better each time i get my benefits and can go out spending neglecting paying the proper amounts on my bills and putting decent food on the table.Once the moneys gone i'm in the depths of dispair again.
Can anyone put a name to this mental illness i obviously suffer from thats making me like this?
Why do i crave after money so i can buy ''Material Things'' that i WANT & if i cant get them i'm pernamently angry and depressed and curse amnd swear at everyone.
I ditched christianity as i couldnt be a born again christian if i tried cause of my problems.There was too much pressure in that cult like elim pentecostal church to chance your ways of living and follow Jesus-and i just couldnt do that as i'm much too materialistic-i want to go my way all the time-not follow the bible-like those religious crackpots wanted to do.
I only started going as i enjoyed the lively modern songs they sing & in a hope the church might help me out with money.
I believe in God but couldnt live the kind of life these so called ''Born Again'' christians do.
I was brought up in a sane ''Normal'' traditional church of england church and thats the way i'm staying.Those extremist pentecostals have i think just made my mental illness worse-they are so dictative and controlling telling you what you can and cant do and how to live your life.
They kept telling me i'd go to Hell because of the way i am with my uncontrolable spending and been in debt etc.
I'm glad i'm away from those nutters now.
Is there anything i can do myself to cure myself of wanting things i just havent got the money for & never will have.
I dont get enough in benefits to save up for things i want & i couldnt save anyway-i'd just keep breaking into the money and going out spending it.
I feel on edge and restless all the time as i cant get anyone-not even my son or ex husband to buy me the £600 i-phone i badly WANT.
I doubt as i'm a middle aged lady that i could even use a i-phone as i'm not used to touch screen and i would proberly find an i-phone complicated to use as i'm used to using old nokis with a key pad just for talk and text.I think i just want to be seen with an i-phone to keep up with the joneses-as a lot of people do have these smart phones these days-and i feel such an odd one out as i cant get one.I keeping trying different networks but because of my debts and bad credit they will not let me take out a mobile contract-all i can ever have is pay as you go with cheap handsets.
As i'm on a debt relief order it will proberly go against me if the official receiver finds i've been trying-unsuccessfuly to obtain an i-phone-so how can i get over this WANT and accept that i cant ever have one & to accept it and be content with my old nokia 6700 as its not that ancient-it does talk,text,photos etc.
I know i've got a problem and its taking over my whole life-is there aay out of this mental illness thats making me this way.
Sorry folks! have had to go under a different name as yahoo have barred me from asking anymore questions now so have had to use my middle name and change my email address in order to ask questions-but this is the final post now i'm canceling this account after my replys have all finished coming in.
Hope someone out there is a phyciatrist or something & can tell me what this mental illness is & can it be cured as its stressing me out not ben able to control my spending & having to go without much in the way of food and clothing & not being able to get my mitts on the i-phone when everyone else is allowed to have them

Answer 1

3 days ago you posted the same sh8t all over yahoo answers, about wanting an Iphone and having a spending addiction and being on benefits. The story is slightly different, but it's still you. Funny, this *Dennis* account was created on the 19th October 2011.



You are an attention seeker and need a doctors help. The answer will not change no matter how many times you post and how many different names you use.



You are angry and bitter? Tough. Get a job then and pay for the stuff you want, or actually deal with your problem and see a psych team!

Answer 2

I don't have a stereo either, or a tv because we can't afford the licence, but we have a computer for uni work - I work and go to college but I don't get any benefits at all. I earn about forty pound a week and half goes to my boyfriend for rent and bills (I know its cheap, if I earned more it'll be more) and the other half goes on food and petrol. I can't say it does bother me not having a tv or stereo and that, I know I will one day.

Answer 3

Denise, I may be wrong but I suspect you asked this question yesterday under the name of Hazel Wykes. I do hope I'm wrong because neither myself or the other good people who answer questions to help deserve to be misled.



If you are genuine, my answer remains the same as the one I gave on the thread I linked to below.

Answer 4

I don't think that Yahoo barred you on your other account, but you maybe didn't have enough points to ask any more questions. Have a look at this link here, it shows you what points you get for different things on Yahoo Answers. Voting for a best answer on someone’s question (in voting) will get you points for example.

http://answers.yahoo.com/info/scoring_system



I think it is important for you to keep talking to people, whether it is on here or in real life. Sometimes when we find ourselves in such a black hole, it can seem impossible to find a way out of the mess.

Answer 5

H. I am no Doctor, but to me this is what it seems to me to be priority for you:



1. Contact your Doctor re your medication and also Mind the Mental Health Charity to see what help is there for you: 0300 123 3393.



Personally I'm wondering if most of your problems are related to your situation, rather than any other reason.



2. You mentioned in another post that you haven't had a good meal with fruit and veg for 10 years and that you have no food in the house, shop from the local shop and this exhausts you etc



This is one of your MAIN problems I think. If you do not eat properly and live off junk food not only will your physical health suffer, but so will your mental health. No doubt about it, and I do believe this could be a large part of your problem.



Can you get groceries delivered to your door from one of the big Supermarkets? You will get far far more for your money than using the local shop for your weekly shopping. From experience my local shop can charge 2/3 times more for food, so you could double or treble the food in your house just by shopping elsewhere. There would also be much greater choice of food in a larger store. If you can't get your food delivered because of living in a block of flats, how much would a taxi cost to bring the food back home? I bet you would still be far better off doing things that way.



You live in a large city, are there are markets near you? If you go near closing time, you get some really good deals when they sell the fruit and veg off cheap at the end of the day.



Look at Shops like Lidl and Aldi which are very cheap or use some of the value ranges in Shops like Tesco etc. I include some of the Value range stuff in my shopping and it's a bit trial and error but some of it is very good.



Make it a rule, that when you get your money, that is the day you have your list written for all the meals you need for the fortnight and write a list of what you need. Leave some money over for the fresh food that you will need to get the following week. Try and cook some food from scratch instead of buying ready meals, it's better for you and cheaper too.



3. Clothes and Shoes, these can be picked up cheaply in the Supermarkets or look online at Ebay for example. Also do you have any Jumble Sales or Car Boots near you? Alot of the stuff on Ebay is where people have bought it from Jumble Sales and Car Boots and sold them on. Another option for you is to contact the Salvation Army or try your local Freecycle group and put an ad on there saying what your clothes size and shoe size is etc. They can also offer furniture etc so look out for the ads



http://uk.freecycle.org/



4. Sitting indoors feeling bad is not going to help you either. Although you didn't get on with the last Church, there may be other Churches more suited that can help you? I mean this from helping you get out of the flat and get some purpose in your life, and they can also help you with friendship and clothing, financially etc. If it is not the Church, then find a Volunteering Group, a Charity Shop or Animal Sanctuary that would interest you, a club anything, but you need a focus to get out of the house.



Depression is an awful thing and is no doubt a big part of your rage and feeling of injustice. You need to sort this out and it may be by taking small steps to help yourself get better. Make yourself do one new thing a day, something that will make things better for you.



You are right about the phone, it isn't really what you want, but you think it will make you feel better about yourself, which it may do for a short time, but as you've said you don't really need it, so any feeling better is only going to be short lived.



You need to make YOU feel better about yourself, and only you can do that. Take things one small step each day and in no time you will start to feel better, just knowing that you have taken control. Eat well, get something to focus on in your life, it may be tight , but you should be able to manage on the £100 a week especially if your son is contributing too with his benefit money. Either with or without him it can be done.

Start with these small steps, and see how soon things are turned around for you. Why don't you do this and then give yourself a reward like a new pair of Shoes from the money you will have saved. It doesn't have to cost much, but it can be your reward and will be more useful than that phone. Set yourself up little rewards each fortnight, it will give you something to focus on.



Good Luck you CAN do this..

Answer 6

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Answer 7

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Answer 8

Make an appointment with a counsellor. In the UK they are free if you contact Mind. You can't have things you can't pay for unfortunately. Just get help, there is help out there. Your first stop for help should be your doctor, he or she can give advice in the first instance.

Answer 9

you can't work because you are disabled but can go out shopping to spend your disability money on worthless crap? you have misused a debt relief order by knowingly getting yourself in debt buying more crap.



i think you feign your "disability" because you get everything given to you in life for free. i hope you get caught out and get your benefits stopped. get off your **** and get a job.



are you mentally ill? NO. you're just an offensive, immature person who throws violent temper tantrums. you do seem to have a learning disability. what is your mental age?

Answer 10

But you are not to mentally iIl to type a complete description of your various ailments are you?



I'm not sure what I can really say that is polite;



Scrounging scumbag?

Liar?

Social Leper?



I pay a ridiculous amount of tax to pay for you to sit at home and have pretend ailments!



I don't have an iPhone either.



I earn 45k but I have HUGE outgoings to make sure that I have more to worry about than petty possesions.

Answer 11

Choose spinach over another green veg: it packs in double the fibre that will help you process fat more quickly.

Answer 12

Supplement your diet with Omega-3 – buy quality and they’ll boost your vitality and burn more fat.