Self-injury and suicide issues. Oh yes. I must be a teen :]?

Question

Started SI when I was 12/13. Was able to quit for about two years when I was 15. Couple slips here and there. At the start of this year I had one big slip. Didn't think I would be able to get over it... I was able to. Then my boyfriend cheated on me. Called me a psycho. Left me. I slit my wrist but then immediately freaked out and stopped the bleeding. However, although I didn't die (obviously) since then I have not been able to stop this SI addiction. I am now 18. I think about it always. It doesn' even take much to send me back into it... the smallest things. Sometimes there's nothing. I just sit there, nothing to do... so I may as well do this. When I do it, I feel as if I am not even there... like it's not me. I'm just watching it with no control. However, I'm not sure I would fight it if I did have the control. It used to be to cope when I was miserable... this time though it's different. I need it. I feel like a junky looking for their next high. Guess it's an addiction?

So my question to you Yahoo Answerers, what do I do? How do I beat it again? Can I beat it?
I mean I thought I had escaped from it. Turns out it was just taking a vaction.

I suspect you will tell me to "confind in a close one... somebody you can trust"
Guess what, not going to happen :'] Sorry but my problems need to be my problems. IF others knew I'm not sure how they would handle it. And I'm not going to push my problems onto them. They have their own stuff.

Now, lets talk suicide! Oh yay what a fun topic.
So I don't think I will do it. I mean, I want to. I don't think I have the guts... I also feel incredibly guilty for thinking about it. I don't want to hurt people. I really don't. My parents are always talking about how devistating it must be for a parent to lose a child and what not. They're great. I love my dad to bits. I don't want to hurt him.
However, I don't know how long I can fight it off? It seems like there's opportunities everywhere. People looking at feeding the dogs as feeding the dogs... I look at it as being able to lock myself away and stab myself in the stomach without them noticing I was gone for enough time to bleed out.
Walking over a bridge should be... walking over a bridge. I see it as a place where I could throw myself off and if that didn't kill me then the cars below should.
It's just everywhere and, I crave it. Fantasize about it. There's a person who wants to come visit me for some... kink fun. They asked if they could strangle me for kicks. I told them as long as they finished off the job. They didn't say no... I'm kind of looking forward to our catchup.

So my questions for this part are:
If I were to commit suicide... what would be the less painful way to do it for my family? Like, what would hurt them the least? What could I leave them to take comfort in?
Should I meet up with this guy? Because it wouldn't exactly be suicide if something were to accidently go wrong. It wouldn't be so bad then right? It would just be an accident? No trouble, no loss. People able to move on?


Thank you.

Answer 1

My best friend killed himself.... I haven't moved on I still miss the **** out of him...



babe with all respect... grow up... A man is not your life... get a goal, aspire to be something or someone.... do you like Fashion then design!!! stop wasting time thinking on a looser who thinks is better than u...



F@ck that... keep the spirit up, show the world they should envy u, instead of feel sorry for you... U dont seem to be stupid yet a little disoriented...



Mail me if u feel like chatting, just plz dont do anything stupid,



best wishes...



P.S.

Think on how many people have lived in worse situations than yours and have succeded in life...

Answer 2

I don't understand the whole injuring yourself thing. I know life is hard and almost to the point of unbearable at times, but you need to be your own help because obviously no one else is going to snap you out of thinking the world would be better without you here. We go through highs and lows, and I have in my 40 years. But it all comes down to whether you are serious about being dead or not. I personally hate the idea. I'd miss so much good along with the shitty. But isn't that the point of life, to endure? You sound intelligent-try embracing something new to do with your life. Fantasize about helping others that deal with the same problem. You could be a counselor or a therapist. I hope you don't hurt yourself again. Only you can choose not to. And as for killing yourself, it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Grow up and face this world head on, because you have no choice. Ending your own life would be the worst decision you've ever made. Asking for help would be the best. And besides, I'd miss you.

Answer 3

Suicide is not the answer. Your family wants you alive not dead.



I had a problem with self-injury and wanting to kill myself. It used to be everytime I was upset. Then it turned into I liked the pain and needed to feel it. For me, the way I quit wanting it was I confided in my brother and he made me promise never to do it again, that he doesn't want me gone. I confess I still slipped up and cut myself.But it really made me feel guilty like I was lying to him if I did hurt myself. Plus scars aren't that pretty. I don't have the guts to kill myself, but cutting for me It's an everyday struggle for me. But I have to keep myself in check, I want kids one day, I want a family. Try a journal it helps me.



I like the answer before, "Get high on life." So true!!

Answer 4

The Luckiest lady contained in the international with the help of Steven Levenkron The Virgin Suicides with the help of Jeffrey Eugenides Crosses with the help of Shelley Stoehr pass Ask Alice with the help of Beatrice Sparks (revealed under the byline nameless) 13 explanation why with the help of Jay Asher

Answer 5

No offense or anything, but what kind of problems can an 18 year old possibly have? Stop ******* crying about life and enjoy life.. At your age, I was getting drunk, going to parties, and coming home late.. and my mom kept beating me up for doing so, but it was fun..

Answer 6

Any kind of suicide is going to severely hurt and possibly tear your family apart.i know how this story ends and its not good for anybody, i don't recommend suicide, just keep living your life, don't hookup with that guy and get a new kind of "high", like... get high on life. try somthing you never have, maybe go to a rehab, psychiatrist....

Answer 7

Wanna commit suicide? easy :P



Method 1. Drink distilled water for a whole day



Method 2. Eat 6 banana's in a row then drink a glass of water

Answer 8

This is why I hate teens. They think they got it bad when they just have stupid, petty issues not worth anything. Your BF leaving you obviously illustrates that. I mean, godd*mn, it's not like you were gonna stay with him forever and get married and live a nice peaceful life in a four bedroom colonial house. Sh*t like that just doesn't happen.

There are people that deal with issues much bigger than your crap, and survive. Don't kill yourself over something as dumb as whatever you're going through. As long as you live on, there's a chance for things to improve.

Answer 9

you need to:



1. get a therapist

2. go to a treatment facility



and if you have anything you want to talk about, im here. cuz ive been thru this EXACTLY! ive not cut in 52 days! i can help u... i want to help you..

and yes self harm does tear apart families!! my parents almost got a divorce cuz they always argued about me. and trust me.... if you keep hurting yourself, it will only get worse!!

love,

young money



ps, email whenever you want. im here for you

Answer 10

when ever i feel low and suicidal, i try to think of others, the children and parents that are fighting for there lives in hospital, people who lose loved ones in accidents and at war, it reminds you how precious life is, you got to pick yourself up and try to do good, to yourself and others. keep ya chin up!