Help? I want to kill myself?

?

2009-11-14 22:58:45 UTC

Stop blaming yourself for other people's actions. Your mother, your friends.... you have your own problems to deal with. They have their own they need to come to terms with. You need to take care of yourself and find something that YOU love. A hobby, an activity, something silly.... anything. Don't worry so much about the future. Things will happen as they happen, and everything will fall into place.

And really, you're not ugly at all. You're really rather pretty. :)

The best advice I could probably give you is take things one step at a time, one day at a time. Baby steps. If things get too stressful or you become really depressed, sit back a second, take a deep breath, and sort out your head. Think of why things are bothering you and what you can do to fix them. And it doesn't have to be anything major. You say you're having problems in class? Make one of your goals for that day to stay attentive through a certain class. Or something easy that seems almost silly. Give yourself little goals to accomplish each day, and then when you start getting a hold of the little things, try to take on something a little bigger. Don't bit off more than you can chew, just take every day as it is.

I hope things get better for you. You seem like a very nice girl, and you look beautiful. You just have to let yourself realize that you are. :)

?

2009-11-14 23:04:35 UTC

I'm just gonna be vague in order to keep your attention. You're beautiful, and I wish that I had the strength that you obviously have. If you've held on this far, you should be strong enough to keep going. I know that you're not alone in this struggle, because I've had friends who have gone through the same bs that you're going through now. Just hold on and stay strong! Just think, if you take your own life, how much more damage would it do to your mother. You just have to be strong for the both of you. Also, you say go with Troy like you're going somewhere with Troy after you die. If you believe in an after-life than that must mean that you believe in a higher power. You should look more into that and think about religion, possibly.... I'm not preaching to you though. I'm 22 and still haven't found religion yet, but I believe in a higher power. Just hang on and every thing will be okay!

anonymous

2016-04-04 03:50:52 UTC

Listen, your baby isn't even aware of anything at this point. It can't be scared and will have no concept or understanding of even existing. Yes you're too young to have a child, especially if you can't raise or take care of it, but killing yourself does nothing. Since you believe in god and heaven why not just wait and live your life until you die of natural causes? You'll be with it eventually regardless. Honestly it sounds like you're really not thinking clearly and need some help. Talk to someone ASAP.

Subcommander Avocado

2009-11-14 22:55:26 UTC

First, I don't think you look ugly. That was not my impression when I saw your pics. Second, you must understand that society puts extreme pressure on people to try to make them look or act in certain ways. It is just that, pressure, it isn't truth or anything like that. When you get older you will begin to realize this more, I think.

Second, don't worry about boyfriends so much. Society pressures people to have boy or girlfriends because society wants to make sure that people reproduce and produce a new population. You don't even need a boyfriend if you don't want one.

Remember, you were born with unique talents and those talents are meant to be applied to make the world better for yourself and others. Good and bad phases will come and go.

Michael

2009-11-14 22:57:11 UTC

1. you should not put photos of you online

2. your friend troy needs immediate help. if your serious, threats of physical punishment to yourself or another is the only thing that can elicit the breaking of confidentiality, thats how serious it is, immediately talk to your guidance counselor, a teacher, your mom, call the police if you need to

3. trust me when i say this, just trust me, we have all been 15 and all had the same feelings. but we have not all talked to someone about it and made the process much harder for ourselves...you need to immediately talk to a teacher or guidance counselor as well.

4. stop having sex so young...just stop. i can give you tons of statistics that say your chances of becoming pregnant while a teenager or contracting an std are incredibly high but im sure that will not get to you, so all i can tell you, is just to stop.

5. love does not equate to sex

6. love at 15 just does not happen..do not follow your urges

7. focus on school...the best thing you will ever have in your life is your education

rmr, talk talk talk...break the silence with someone you trust, not a peer, but a teacher, a boss, a counselor at school

anonymous

2009-11-14 23:27:18 UTC

you are cute I think you look really good in pic number 4. Im not a fan of the blue hair you should go back to whatever it was then. You should break up with your bf and tell him to man up and quit being a pussy about it. You and Troy should go to counseling you could go together if it makes you feel more comfortable. But you are awesome and you just need to realize that.

Jezzica

2009-11-14 22:59:15 UTC

yea, sometimes you think things are so bad that you cant take it...but then you go through it and you will always feel better eventually. its always that way. just get through it. pick up those grades...go to college...cuz its the best way to get away. ur gonna have to deal with it until then.

Oh and btw...posting ur pic on here to see if ppl think your ugly or not is just askin for trouble. not that your ugly but ppl will say so whethere you are or you arent. There are also people on here that will tell u to just go and commit suicide. They really can't help themselves that they're stupid...but you can be smart.

anonymous

2014-04-04 09:14:32 UTC

there's no going back if u do this. just remember there's people who would long to have a life like u have, u should appreciate it and not waste it. we all feel this way at times, yours has just gone on a little longer. open your eyes. imagine seeing someone in a car crash and the expressions on the faces of the family members in the car with them. they weep and weep, they pray and beg, they would do anything for that persons life back, and your just going to waste yours? your going to inflict that pain upon your family, parents holding there child's body, and they'll probably blame themselves for the rest of their lives and feel as you do now. see a doctor or physiatrist to sort u out, there's no shame in it. please think carefully. 2 years ago a member of yahoo posted a very long answer to a similar question, their name is 'death cab' I think, search him up if u want to read his thoughts, they are very well said and I couldn't agree more. (apologies for his name)

hope this helps

anonymous

2009-11-14 23:02:15 UTC

It's a good thing I saw your question, because I have the magic solution that you have not thought of yet...

Here it is, are you ready?

Tomorrow or some time this week, you are going to acquire a guitar (acoustic or electric, or a microphone to sing with) and you are going to start learning how to play it. (or sing)

It's real easy, and when I was about your age, my parents divorced, and to deal with their wackiness, I hid away in my room learning to play guitar.

I wrote heart-wrenching songs about pain and unloved feelings and whatever I was bummed about at the time, and it worked like magic. I felt better about myself and everybody else around me, and I realized that "I" am okay even if everybody else around me "isn't okay..."

Got it?

You must reach deep inside yourself and let that rock music hero come out, and to hell with anybody who is bumming you out. You are like "Sarah Conner" from the movie "The Terminator" and you will not let life get you down.

The future of rock music needs you...

Now dress a little more rock music style, get a stiletto blade you keep strapped to your thigh, and stop letting boyz have sex with you for a while (because you're right, they just want sex when they're that age), and take pride in being somebody who learned the hard way that "the hard way" is not the only or best way, and anybody can do better than that, especially "you," who are in reality, a very intense and loving person inside, and you deserve respect and dignity from your peers, and if they won't accept that, you will get a whiffle ball bat and beat them all senseless over the head until they fricken start to "rep-ree-zent" and respect you as a young woman and a force of nature to be reckoned with...

???????

2009-11-14 23:06:31 UTC

PLEASE..make sure none of your friends or yourself do ANYTHING to hurt yourself..three of my classmates lost their lives this week due to a motor vehicle accident and one to suicide. i cannot urge you enough of the pain the entirecommunity is suffering from. i cannot stop grieving and crying hun, and i didn't know them. you are not ugly at all...and in fact, you are very pretty(i love your hair...:]..), you remind me of bri..one of my friends who was involved in the accidents. everyone understands that people can have serious pain but suicide makes everything worse. you have been through an incredible amount of s**t but you are not worthless..(sorry for the language)..if you are on this earth, there is a reason for it. think of kayla. she loves you, and what will she do? tell troy to not take his life....urge your boyfriend to ease off and try to settle things out..

If necessary, talk to a counselor and try to find a foster home or community center that can provide a family for you..not irresponsible parents. if you feel insecure, change it. discover your talent, art, music, sports, making others happy...look at the things you appreciate, and don't allow the negatives in your life to overdose the positives. i feel for you although i do not personally know you hun. Brianna you are beautiful, and you don't deserve to get hurt anymore....<3..Please..think of yourself..YOU do not deserve this, and neither does anyone else...<3

anonymous

2009-11-14 22:58:18 UTC

You are beautiful, and you look so happy in your pictures. Sometimes, when you feel like crap, just crying can help. It doesn't help when you are crying, but afterwards you feel so much better. If you kill yourself, think of all the people you will hurt. Your friends will be devastated. Suicide isn't the answer, and I really hope you feel better just venting to us.

icefire_lioness

2009-11-14 23:34:05 UTC

Oh honey, you're beautiful! Don't ever think that suicide is the answer, because honestly, as hard as it is to believe it - as bad as you feel now, things WILL get better. They always do.

It sounds as though you're going through a really tough time, and that sucks. Just try and keep things in perspective. Yeah things seem awful, but it will get better. I've gone through a lot of the same stuff as you - I'm the result of some pretty messed up stuff and recently did some stuff that stems from those feelings which I'm really ashamed of. BUT I'm now on a much healthier track and things have started to sort themselves out. I know how it feels to feel as though you are ****. It's a gross feeling, and I've had the horrible experience of thinking about killing myself. It's not nice, but you do realise eventually that it isn't the right choice.

Talking to people about your problems is very helpful. It might feel as though you are being self-centred for a while, but it will really help to get your problems aired to someone with a face. :) Talk to a counsellor (a school counsellor is free if that's an issue for you) or someone who you trust. Don't let any of the people in your life manipulate you into being in situations that make you feel bad.

I don't want to be all judgey (am though), but having sex at such a young age is a recipe for disaster. I know what it stems from generally (feeling as though you aren't getting enough attention and love from family etc) which may not be true for you, although it sounds as though it could be. You need to have self respect for yourself before you do something like that. Otherwise you'll just end up getting hurt. This isn't to do with so called 'skanky behaviour' because I think that as long as you enjoy yourself and feel as though you're ready, sex shouldn't be a dirty thing. Sex is very healthy, and people get mixed up with that, because sometimes the situations they get into with sex is not very nice.

Don't feel as though you have to be with someone to prove your self worth. Sometimes to have self respect you have to be single for a while. It sounds to me as if BJ and you should sit down and talk maturely about how you can't deal with something as intense as a relationship while all this other stuff is going on. Maybe he won't be able to deal with it maturely, but you have to know that it isn't your duty to stay miserable with someone so that they don't hurt themselves or someone else. It's emotional blackmail for him to say things like that and you can't let him think that he can get away with it. Stand your ground. He won't kill himself over it - truly.

Go to counselling, get something for the depression. Sometimes pills are the only thing that help. I wish you all the luck in the world, beautiful. Just remember - it's all about perspective!

Hugs and kisses. Good luck!

anonymous

2009-11-14 22:55:14 UTC

youre not ugly at all! things in your life may seem awful right now but use it as motivation to make your life better! you should try to get help for your bf. it seems like he needs it and if you dont want to be with him you should break up with him. you should try to go to a good college so that you can become independent and find better people in your life. i know things will get better for you :)

chris

2009-11-14 22:59:16 UTC

simple get away fro those who don't understand IE your mother and her boyfriend

secondly constantly drown out the depression with depressing thoughts and songs your not ugly and your not a whore and finally i know how you feel i was once like you except the opposite sex. and dont forget to clear your head

it happens to the bes of us

kdafjaight

2009-11-14 22:54:57 UTC

Get rid of the blue hair and get brown or blonde hair and you'll be wayy prettier. :) and omg i wish i could help you. i just think you should move in with another member of your family that dosen't have all this going on. or consider getting a foster family or something like that??

Goose

2009-11-14 22:55:10 UTC

Go do something fun and exciting with some friends that you have always wanted to do nut have never gotten the chance to do it...

sexii_chic

2009-11-14 23:07:12 UTC

WELL YOU CAN GO TO GOOGLE AND SEARCH HOW TO KILL YOUR SELF AND N/H BUT..... YOUR NOT UGLY AND I LOVE THE COLOR OF YOUR EYES THEY'RE SO PRETTY.<>!!! YOUR SHOULD NEXT TIME WHEN HE PUT HIS HANDS ON YOUR MOTHER CALL THE POLICE 911 FOR ABUSE OR LIE AND SAY ATTEMPTIVE MURDER SO HE STAY AWAY FROM YOU'LL AND YOU DONT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT HIM ANY MORE!(THIS IS COMING FROM THE HEART)..

Mac S

2009-11-15 01:32:12 UTC

Sad story. Cyber-help ain't gonna fix what you got.

anonymous

2009-11-14 23:00:58 UTC

Go blonde or brunette =P talk to ca counselor and stop ******* =P

rich95

2009-11-14 22:54:37 UTC

just go buy a pack of cigs or the neighborhood pot heads, and get high or smoke a cig, and then when u wake up tommorow youll completely forget that you were having those feelings. and live on with your life. Suicide is never the answer. Life gets better.

anonymous

2009-11-14 22:58:10 UTC

Talk to someone at you're school about your problems killing yourself is never the answer it only brings more pain. Talk to your counselor at you're school they will help you.

Phil M

2009-11-14 22:54:29 UTC

**** you're hot...

You just need to get yourself away from the situation. take your friend troy and Run away, go anywhere, it really doesn't matter. Just get out of that situation.

anonymous

2009-11-14 22:52:44 UTC

Try going to see a counselor?

JUNNIPER

2009-11-14 23:00:33 UTC

join the club. does life get better? how will you find out?

Kathy

2009-11-15 00:05:56 UTC

First of all, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but 99% of people would think you were among the prettiest girls.

Second, I'm glad you're reaching out.

Third, you seem bright and full of pomise by your writing and because you reconize what is wrong with your family situation. (I'd worry more if you thought your situation was okay.)

I understand a bit about what you are going through. My parents were divorced when I was 2 and passed me back and forth. My Dad met his obligations, but I never had a father daughter relationship. I never felt loved by him. He ended up telling me to get the f**** out of his house one day and I haven't seen him since. My Mom was a mean person. My older sister says she wasn't mean before the divorce. I wouldn't know since I was 2 at the time. She took out her frustrations in life on me and my 2 sisters. She would tell me I was fat and lazy and a bad kid. She would tell my sister she was a b**** and that she hated her. She continually threatened to kick us out or send us to Juvi. She hit us and theatened us. And, I never felt loved by her either. I know now that we were really good kids, in fact. I was always looking for someone to connect with or bond with. I wanted to have someone who loved me and who I could trust and count on, so I started going with guys and lost my virginity at 13 also. I just liked thinking that someone thought I was special and that someone thought I was a priority. Without a boyfriend, I didn't really feel important to anyone. I was dissapointed by boys many times when things didn't work out. Break ups were harder on me because I was so needy and that did damage over time. (I also had a boyfriend threaten to kill himself if I broke up with him. It made me mad because I knew for sure that he didn't care about me. He wouldn't have put that on me if he did. I broke up with him anyway. He didn't do it.) Even though I could always find a boy who wanted to be my boyfriend, it wasn't enough. It didn't change what my life was. I thought to myself, "If this is what life is all about, I'm outta here!" I came close, but for whatever reason, I never acted on my suicidal thoughts. Looking back, I'm so glad I didn't. I still don't have contact with my Dad and my contact with my Mom is minimal. But; that horrible, lonely time in my life passed, and I made my life great. I did it. Not my parents. Not a boy who loved me. Not my friends. I did it. You can too.

If I could go back in time and talk to myself when I was 13 or 14 or 15 and going through all of that I would say, "PROMISE you won't give up! You are in a horrible situation, but you can decide what your life will become. And, there are a lot of wonderful things to experience in life. You just don't know it yet because you haven't had a chance to get out there. You don't realize your value right now, but trust my advise because I know it and give yourself a chance to discover it. Be picky about who you are friends with. Invest your time in those friends who are good people doing healthy things and are from healthy families and learn from them. Look for healthy parent figures that you can count on (like an aunt and uncle or close friends parents). That will help you when you have a family some day. Look for and spend time with people who you can have innocent fun with and who make you laugh and forget your troubles. You need that. Don't waste time with the others. And, keep nice boys as friends, so you can learn about different types of boys and start to think about what type is best for you. Boys will tell you they love you when they don't because they want to use you. Some will think they love you when they don't and it will hurt and confuse you when they don't treat you well or realize you aren't what they want and leave you. Don't sleep with a boy until you are older and feel good about your situation and like yourself. And, that day WILL come! You will be better able to pick the right guy then. If you keep going with boys to feel love, you will regret the time you wasted with the wrong boys when you are older. You will wish you had used it on making healthy lasting friendships instead. Focus on school. Don't let anyone get in your way with that. Doing well in school now will make it easier to create a great, fun life for yourself. If you can qualify to get into a university, you can live on campus (with a scholarship or government grant or loan) and get out of your situation as soon as you graduate high school. There are hard times in life, but it doesn't have to be as hard as what you are going through now if you plan ahead and start making some changes now." I can't go back and tell myself this, but I can tell you and maybe help you to think about some things that would have helped me.

Try to find someone you can trust to talk to about what's going on in your family now. The abusive situation your mother has put you in is not good. You should get away. But, I realize that is easier said than done. By talking to an adult you can trust, you might find a way out of this situation. Do you have aunts and uncles, clergy at church, a school counselor, or someone you could try talking to? If you like animals, I would recommend voluneering at an animal rescue. Animals can comfort you through tough times, they don't judge you, they are happy to just be with you, and they respond positively to your care and attention. This could give you something to look forward to each day or week.

You are not alone. There is a national suicide help line at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

Please read this too. http://areason.org/ Always remember that these feelings will pass.

donuthater

2009-11-14 22:59:03 UTC

i've been in similar situations. this a bunny

http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://cute-n-tiny.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/bunny11.jpg&imgrefurl=http://cute-n-tiny.com/cute-animals/top-10-cutest-bunnies-youll-see-today/&usg=__ef_5ZvE_l0oJatuIdLcdHRsOIio=&h=326&w=400&sz=20&hl=en&start=4&sig2=BZwdkvN1yMmLluwiIDTJ7w&tbnid=e2cNbJqdDPPhZM:&tbnh=101&tbnw=124&prev=/images?q=bunny&hl=en&safe=off&sa=N&ei=yKX_Svv0J-mLnAee8MnGCw

?

2009-11-14 22:54:42 UTC

awsome blue hair and blue eyes!:)

Blueskies

2009-11-14 23:14:32 UTC

http://www.save.org -- Good luck!

ShakeZulaa.... 0_o

2009-11-14 22:53:24 UTC

wtf why you post the same stuff for f?