can somebody please help: I suffer from social anxiety that is ruining my life?

Question

I have been suffering from panic attacks, social anxiety and agoraphobia now for over a year, and for the past 6 months I have been trying to overcome them but finding it impossible. I first went to my doctor who recommended cognitive therapy which I agreed could work so I booked myself in and at the end of all the therapy sessions I was over my agoraphobia but not my panic attacks and social phobia, so I went back to my doctor who prescribed me citalopram as it was supposed to be good, I am now taking this once a day and although it has helped me somewhat it isn't dealing with the problem head on.
I now work 4 hours per evening but finding it really hard to socialize and remain calm at work, I get paranoid and anxious all the time, I cannot tell the difference between playful banter and general bullying but all I know is I get confused and I don't know how to behave, so I instead I tend to be quiet and try to fade into the background and I think people notice this so they target me more as they see me as weak, but if I stand up for myself they might see me as being weird as they could only be playing when I think they are being rude.
Aside from all that I stopped seeing all my old friends as they all took drugs so I have no friends, and I have never had a girlfriend and probably never will due to my social ineptness.
So here I am on the earth, a 19 year old male, with no friends, not much of a life, no future wife and no hope, and not much of a life.
Sorry to go on but life sucks and I cannot wait much longer for things to get better

Answer 1

I have panic disorder. Citalopram is one of the medications that is useful for this disorder, but it may take up to 8 weeks for the drug to actually treat the disease. In addition, people with this type of anxiety disorder may need doses that are higher than those used to treat depression. So, I am very proud of you for taking part in cognitive therapy-it's great! Now, remember what you learned there and practice it while the citalopram totally "kicks-in" and make sure the doctor has you on the correct dose. I did the complete opposite of you. I was put on meds first,the agoraphobia subsided, but I still felt something was lacking after 9 months. That's when it was suggested I begin cognitive-behavioral. Both together worked very well. You'll be okay. It takes time. The only other thing I can suggest is asking your doctor to recommend someone to help you become more assertive. Panic tends to make a person hide from confrontation or angry (although the anger does not seem to be expressed outwardly). Assertiveness allows a person to convey their feelings without any victimization. Take care.

Answer 2

If you're a happy person, people will be happy to be around you.

I'm sure if you explain to your 'work mates' whats going on, and apologize if you think you may have upset them, they'll be cool with it :)



As for the girlfriend/wife, don't worry about it. I'm sure there is a girl out there for you. Just be patient and you'll find her.



As for now, listen to lots of happy up beat music, and keep smiling :) try and concentrate on the good things in your life such as your family? or things you like about the place you live.

If its possible a pet cat or dog might make you feel like you have a purpose, as well as being cute and friendly regardless of your social skills. good luck mate, hope I helped C:

Answer 3

i dont know how to say this, but i know exactly how you feel man. im 18. i used to be the most social person when i took paxil, but it made me feel so messed up. since age 15 i have had really bad social anxiety depression and OCD. like i have tons of friends, but i never talk to them cuz im so scared. it hurts so bad, cuz i know there are multiple girls that like me... and i like them too, but i cant talk to them cuz im so scared. no body really understands how i feel...they just say "get more confidence" which ive tried but doesnt work.



ive orderd like 200 dollars worth of supplements online to help, but none of them have fixed it. they only help a tiny bit. i read about social anxiety all the time, and it seems overactive 5ht2 receptors may have a contributing action to anxiety. the only way desensitize 5ht2 is too take hallucinogens like shrooms and LSD, and i cant get any.



i see the world differently cuz ive been through so much pain. if i could just get better, i would change the world. i just cannot get rid of this obstacle. i am so frustrated, ive waited so long, i wasted this whole school year, all this oppurtunity and friends and fun, just waiting for things to get better. i dont know wat the answer is, but dude, im with u man, dont give up yet

Answer 4

No future wife? Me too probably. But we can't give up hope right. I would pray. Nothing seems to help me when I have social anxiety. So I just pray about it and try not to beat myself up for not being where I'd like to socially.

Answer 5

Same here! I was coming onto this web site to try to figure out ways to get better from this! This is ruining my life, and im in DESPERATE need of help! Im 16, and scared to talk to my parents about it. Im paranoid and anxious and dont know what to do! If you get any good advice that you think will or has helped you, seriously MESSAGE ME BACK!

Answer 6

Hey!

You sound just like me. Deep breathing really does help, and i recomend jasmine tea, even though i know when you feel anxious you often dont wanna eat or drink anything.

Message me = )