Did I admit something that I should have just kept to myself, and what do I do now?

Question

This is a longish story. Here goes.

So we're doing speeches at school (they are compulsory), and my English class has a general topic of 'rites of passage.' I'm doing mine on depression, but only because I thought it would be easier writing from experience.

Yes, I've been depressed. Still am. I don't think I've been doing a very good job of hiding it, either, because my English teacher was asking about it yesterday, and I admitted that I am depressed. He also asked whether or not I'm in danger of hurting myself. I lied and said no. I am constantly in danger of hurting myself, because I have done if before and I'm not about to stop anytime soon.
(Please don't tell me not to do it. I know, okay? I know I shouldn't do it and that it's probably a sign of a poor coping mechanism. Just don't.)

Now I'm talking to him about it tomorrow and I don't know if I should tell him I lied. I'm pretty sure he's legally obliged to tell someone if I do come out and say it, which is exactly what I don't want.

I don't know if I should tell him because of this. I mean, yes, I'm cutting myself and yes, I've had suicidal thoughts but I just don't know, and my mind's in turmoil.

I have this feeling that I should just do it and tell him and get counselling but there's this huge part of me that is against it. What on earth do I do?

Answer 1

I've been in your boat. When I was in high school I told my English teacher I was depressed and lied saying I wasn't hurting myself. I use to cut myself especially when I got so sad that my sadness turned into anger. My arm would look like it went through a blender. I never talked to my teacher about it though because I don't talk to anyone about that stuff. After high school I met my current boyfriend and he changed everything for me. I've not cut in years. I believe that sometimes it takes a certain person to help you get through things. I do recommend you get some help though because if I could go back in time I would've. Maybe you will meet people in your same position. I really hope things turn out better for you. Lifes hard and complicated but stay strong. :)

Answer 2

Ok, skip the whole drama of telling your teacher and go straight to a school counselor or talk to someone about this. Seriously, don''t say that in front of your whole class, you will get judged.

Answer 3

STOP CUTTING YOURSELF AND TELL HIM